16. Cooking my own meals would be an adventure, not a punishment.
15. I wouldn't have to explain why I'm wearing "that" shirt with "those"
pants.
14. I could leave the toilet seat in any position I damn well please.
13. I could actually tell the bartender, "If anyone calls, I'm here".
12. I'd be painting the town instead of the house.
11. I could show my girlfriend where I live.
10. I'd be driving a miniskirt instead of a minivan.
9. The only weeds I'd be concerned with are the ones I'm rolling.
8. I would have saved $372,416.21 in groceries by now.
7. I wouldn't catch so much grief about those skid-marks in my underwear!
6. I'd get to see what my pay check looks like.
5. I'd get to see what my credit cards look like.
4. Bachelors don't have Mother-in-laws.
3. I could use my own name at hotels.
2. I wouldn't have a driving instructor grading me every time I go somewhere.
1. When asked his opinion, a single guy can say "Hell yes, you do look fat
in that!".
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