1. Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of
your kleenex to other passengers.
2. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and
muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"
3. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World"
incessantly.
4. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while
peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"
5. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator.
Wear yours upside-down.
6. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing
the wall, without getting off.
7. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to
yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they
open by themselves.
8. Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol coming!"
9. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm
handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.
10. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand
that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped
down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.
11. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while,
and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"
12. When at least eight people have boarded, moan from
the back: "Oh, not now, damn motion sickness!"
13. Meow occasionally.
14. Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your
nose.
15. Frown and mutter "gotta go, gotta go" then sigh and say
"oops!"
16. Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks
infected.
17. Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.
18. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
19. Stare at another passenger for a while, then
announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far
corner of the elevator.
20. Burp, and then say "mmmm...tasty!"
21. Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to
the other passengers.
22. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask
"is that your beeper?"
23. Say "Ding!" at each floor.
24. Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.
25. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
26. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and
announce to the other passengers that this is your
"personal space."
27. Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another
passenger: "Wanna see wha in muh mouf?"
28. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more
suitable host body."
29. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
30. Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at other
passengers.
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